Blacktail, more like Suck...tail

Since I didn't receive a script today, I whipped this up.

How about a proper introduction?

Hello future readers, hello from the past. These are our humble origins (I can dream, can't I?)

This comic, not sure if we have a name yet, is the bastard child of our wonderful artist, Vanja Mrgan, and the fledgling creative minds of me, Lee Olson, and my friend, James Quinn.

We will try to deliver video game references along with plain old fashioned observant wit, a number of times a week, but no promises yet.

That being said, what do you say we get some color up in this bitch Vanja?

I'm just playing, you're what makes this comic happen, don't get pissed and leave.

Wish us luck.

You Bowl

Bit late, sorry about that.

-Vanja

Known for his *ahem* masterpieces Alone in the Dark, Bloodrayne, House of the Dead, Uwe Boll is a name that is recognized by gamers everywhere, and Gabe and Tycho of Penny Arcade decided to give him an invite to the Penny Arcade Expo this past weekend as a special guest. Hilarity!

So today, on my way over to Vanja's to work on today's comic, we stopped at Wendy's. Against my better judgement I ordered their new special, The Baconator. "Six strips of hickory smoked bacon piled high atop two 1/4 lb.* patties of fresh, never frozen, beef. Complete with two slices of American cheese, mayo and ketchup for a mountain of mouth-watering taste" They may as well have just named this burger the fucking heart attack special. I won't lie, the first few bites were good, but after that it was just too much. I only finished it off to prove to Vanja that I could..

Don't make that mistake, guys. Protect your arteries from the evil that is The Baconator.

-James

Woes of the Core

-Vanja

Well, who honestly didn't see this coming? We all called this one over two years ago when Microsoft announced their inane decision to release a 360 package without a hard drive. If anything, this is good news for me. I own a 360 with a hard drive, and if a game can benefit from using the added hardware, I'm all for developers doing what they need to do to make their game the best it can be. However, this is a huge "screw you" to the people who bought a core unit, and haven't invested in a hard drive for whatever reason.

Microsoft used to say it was for the "casual crowd" who didn't "want to go online with their games." Now, Grand Theft Auto IV, a game in a series that everybody fucking plays regardless of whether they are "casual" or not, could possibly require the hard drive? Good job making yourself look like jackasses, Microsoft. Also, what's up with the core's price drop? The Elite and the Premium both saw a $50 drop, the core only dropping $30, so a premium unit is only $80 more than the core. Why not just go ahead and phase the core out?

-James
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For the record, this is my favorite quote any company has ever released, besides "Brawl comes out December 3rd."

'Every game will work with every Xbox 360 system...But just like some games will require you to have a Memory Unit to save games, some games will require you to have a Hard Drive to experience them' -Microsoft

-Vanja

Kirby Kannabalism

All gamers are looking forward to Super Smash Bros Brawl. Masahiro Sakurai has been offering up tantalizing details about the game at The Dojo since May 22nd. We've learned quit a bit about the Final Smash moves, some ranging from fucking awesome(Giga Bowser) to meh(Pikachu Electricity Ball) to, well, bizarre. On this note we present Kirby Kannibalism.

On another note, this college life is pretty sweet. Only having classes two days a week allows me a lot of free time. Free time that the stringent high school schedule of 7 hours a day every day just didn't allow. I've been using all this free time to catch up on some games that I bought, but never got around to finishing. Mainly, I've been playing Hotel Dusk: Room 215. I got a bit frustrated with it when I first started, as I lost about an hour of game play due to not saving. I started over, and I'm so glad I did. As someone who enjoys reading, this interactive mystery novel is really a great experience for me.

In closing, I ask this question

Why, Sega? Why are you doing this again?

-James

Don't Try This At Home

True Story